Revised Jun 6 2021

No. 31. Mr. P. Heywood to all his Sisters

July 12th: H:M:S: Hector Portsmouth 1792

My beloved Sisters all.

This Day I had the supreme Happiness of your long expected Letters, & am not able to express the Pleasure & Joy they afforded me; at the Sight of them, my Spirits, low and dejected were at once exhilarated — my Heart had long & greatly suffered from my Impatience to hear of those most dear to me, & was tossed & tormented by the storms of fearful Conjecture — But they at once subsided, & my Bosom has at length attained that long-lost serenity & Calmness it once enjoyed; — for believe me it never yet has suffered any Disquiet from my own Misfortunes, but from a truly anxious Solicitude for, & to hear of your Welfare. — God be thanked you still entertain such an Opinion of me as I will flatter myself I have deserved; but why do I say so? can I make myself too worthy the affectionate Praises of such amiable Sisters? — Oh! my Nessy — it grieves me to think I must be under the Necessity, however Heart-breaking to myself, of desiring you will relinquish your most affectionate Design of coming to see me, — tis too long & tedious a Journey, & even on your Arrival you wou'd not be allowed the wished-for Happiness both to you & myself of seeing, much less conversing with your unfortunate Brother; the rules of the Service are so strict that Prisoners are not permitted to have any Communication with female relations, thus even the sight of, & Conversation with so truly affectionate a Sister is for the present denied me: — The Happiness of such an Interview let us defer till a Time (which please God will arrive) when it can be enjoyed with more Freedom & unobserved by the gazing Eyes of an inquisitive World, which in my present Place of Confinement wou'd of Course be the Case. — I am very happy to hear that poor old Birket is still alive — remember me to her & tell her not to heave aback till God grants me the Pleasure of seeing her. — I sincerely lament the Death of my much respected Friend Mr. Betham & condole with my Uncle Heywood for the loss of my poor Cousins — Alas! my dear Nessy — cease to anticipate the Happiness of personal Communication with your poor but resigned Brother untill wished-for Freedom takes the indignant shackles I now bear from the Feet of your fond

& most affectionate

    Peter Heywood